A little love

who posted this on MY blog!! I wanna know right now!!!! Gerrrrr...Your all under arrest!

I, I....Ughhhh


Self discovery

It seems I'm good with provisioning. I always knew I was, it's just people some times say no and no always seems bigger then yes. Truth is, if u get three nos' and one yes, that equals success.
I always win!" I shoot up a powerful, accurate prayer before hand, visualize and believe that it is the Lord's will for us to have that brand new trash bin for the Kitchen (wooden crates are great really, brilliant improvisation) and presto! 50 percent of the time they never say no, thats cause 50 percent of the time they actually understand me, so its safe to say they never say no...50 percent of the time.
"Failure is the final result of believing you can do less then you can, success is when you believe you can do more then you can": Motivational Comment from last home council ....Umm "YEAH, wehoo"! And it was totally off the top of ones head.
After three of our main outreachers who are fluent in Spanish left the home, a lot of us felt a little stifled. How are we going to cultivate a flock who doesn't understand us? It's simple. I found the answer while observing my meat market partner. Hand gesticulations, sometimes we underestimate their power and accuracy.
And also, every one understands love. We have been inventing all kinds of ways to feed our sheep and be useful to them. The word can also do a lot of the talking. Thank God Activated is in Spanish.
But then there are those words that you need to have on the spot, words that u can't really describe with your hands without looking...foolish, like spinach. For those words, I make a list and some one here who is fluent in Spanish will write them down for me, I memorize them in the car, it's a great way to learn as well.
I'm actually starting to cultivate my own little flock of warm and fuzzy little sheep. The phone is starting to ring for me! Can you believe it? People are calling ME!" Amazing, the sheer joy alone keeps me on the line trying futilely to describe where I'll meet them with my hands. Heh, I wonder what keeps them on the line haha. Must be the God factor.
I think another thing that I personally undermine is the use of our spiritual forces and heavenly arsenal to make things happen. We are really helpless without them. There is nothing we can do to make some one drop a day out of their life to check out a place that's farther then what most people would consider feasible, for of all things, a bible class. Bible classes are not exactly up there with Taekwondo or Yoga classes. But when you walk into a shop after emerging yourself in vigilant prayer, putting on the Lord's mind, people tend to take notice. For sure there is no way they would be into 63 kls of salty, wanna-be Latina, fresh off the ol Gringo block. So, when people call up and want to know more, its got to be the God factor.

I know what your thinking, theres no way hand gesticulation would help this guy with a language barrier, still I highly recommend you look into some of his other videos if your feeling anything might be too great of a road block for you. Despite the show he puts on here, some of his other Videos show he is a strong Christian and travels all over the world doing missionary work. Eat that fully limbed whiners!!




I was looking over last years birthday photos, the guys took me mountain climbing! Absolutely fantastic! But 22 has finally turned into 23. I'm not going to deny I dread it but I do have to face it. I'm growing up, well not really, I think this is as big as I'm going to get but I plan on doing a different kind of growing up this year.
I was reading Carry the Flame of the Revolution a few weeks ago and it hit me pretty hard again, always does.
If the family is going to fulfil the Lord's calling, its up to us to pick up the torch and stand in the gap. It's hard when you have all these left over 16 year old juices pumping threw your veins, but I've decided that this year I'm going to foucus that energy into something more productive for my home and teem. Already the make over has begun, last aria fellowship I looked threw my wardrobe and found nothing but NICE clothes to wear.
A year ago I told the Lord that if he really wanted me to go from hippie to chique, He would have to supply the proper offensive dress code. He did and now I have not a thing to look shabby in.
Trust me, for some of us Looking Nice, was really bottle braking and revolutionary haha.
So here I go, 24 is waiting...wish me a happy birthday will you!!

This photo by Ivan war horse, please pray that this month's fund raising goes excellent for him.
and something for me from my brother Jess who loves me


I went to the Cervantonio in Guanajuato. It was amazing. I prayed with only 10 people, shameful I know, some people got up to 100 saved.
Well, my excuse is two of the guys I got saved were atheists and I ended up spending a lot of time with them. I hardly speak spanish but did my best. It was just the Lord they ended up praying cause half the time I didn't even know what I was saying.
These are a few photos of our team. I took tons of the actual Gypsy dancing and the holly ghost sample as well as the band playing but to my total embarrassment, I was using some one Else's cam. heee..
Lucky person got some great shots! Amazing!"
Love you all!


Take a sad song and make it Better

better, better, better AAAAAAh"!
And now to make you laugh, my final thrust into the hearts and minds of my readers, if this doesn't move you, there is no remedy.


one for the rocord

happy are the people who's God is the Lord.
Any one can be sad, being happy is being strong.

"the joy of the Lord is our strength".
Me: Not a party animal, I'm dancing cause no one else is. once I get the ball rolling I'll retire. If not, this could be a long night.
hate empty spaces, believe in touch so "touch me", gravitate to happy people.
Life is ironic so is the smile on my face.
greatest lesson learned "bad will be good 1 day". some how I still tend to be negative tho always hopeful.
I don't believe being serious makes anyone look more mature.
I've learned to cry without tears. I have tear glands, but they are completely unreliable. I feel 2 much yet some how people still tell me I'm cold. "try rolling ice off my back".
my greatest asset is my love for the Lord. My strongest weakness my wandering mind. I'm social but don't have many close friends. I'm cynical but still come threw for strangers & there is no limit 2 how far I'll go 4 family. I'm often taken advantage of but thats my fault. If I can't be helpful I'll feel helpless. I try not to judge and disagree with gossip. although I'm not guiltless, I will give every one a chance. The only way I cannot forgive you is if you don't want me to. The only reason you would not forgive me is if you don't want to, I'm really just all about what you want… "twinkle twinkle :D".
Lack of communication is poisonous.
If I don't live up to all the above, don't be surprised. life requires that we reinvent ourselves many times over.
My Name is Clay cause the Lord gave me a new beginning, I don't feel embarrassed by it, I'm hardly ever embarrassed. if you don't like it I'm not gonna cry, but I really think lack of respect along with lack of love is becoming more and more our biggest human flaw.



Flirty Faces

the photo shoot took about two days, we really wanted to capture a lot of smiles...
Shani: now me!
Clay: now me!
Shani: you look silly!
Clay: you ARE silly!


Frogi Face

I have a friend, her name is Jess, she lives in Brazil, she has a blog...
here.... I call it Frogi Face cause Jess makes really good frogi faces,
I can't make a frogi face but I have a long tongue similar to a frogi tongue,
so I use that ...

I love you Jess, miss you and all the happy people who love Jesus in Brazil!!



Individual Christianity Potentially Dangerous

I've been in the states for about two weeks for the sake of my vista trip and checking up on my family. In this short time I've already been exposed to great deal of anti cult, anti religion and anti God TV shows and propaganda. Each one, be it a documentary or leading advertisement in a public theater, cautions viewers to avoid people who believe in the Bible's doctrines concerning the rise of the Antichrist and the second coming of Jesus. Also "any group that is not associated with a Church has potential to be a terrorist movement". Individual Christianity is now potentially dangerous. The word 'Cult' is becoming synonymous to even the most established religions precisely because its a word the Government uses to send our fear levels soaring up to the "red zone", ooh no, danger danger.
Perhaps we need to research the word Cult before we start throwing the word around.

Quotations about cults:

"...one person's cult is another's religion; all religions begin life as cults. An alternative definition is that a cult is a religion which you happen to dislike." Anthony Campbell 1
"Cult is a word without much use outside the realm of religious mudslinging." Philip Kennicott2
"When someone uses the word 'cult,' it usually says more about them than the group," J. Gordon Melton, founder and director of The Institute for the Study of American Religion. 3
"It's easy to tell the difference - a cult is someone else's religion. Corollary: "A fanatic is someone who believes something more strongly than you do." Jim Heldberg 4
"I have often thought that the difference between a cult and a religion is an IRS ruling." Ron Barrier 4

I saw one documentary on the biography of cults and their crazed leaders. Some how they managed to twist the image of Charles Manson with that of Jesus Christ. There was also a large emphasis on the need to eliminate any "Religious Fanatics" as police forces say its become too difficult to tell between potential mass murderer's and devout Christians.

Almost 70% of movies being produced since 2003 are heavily antagonistic and derogatory towards religion, even those based on biblical doctrine. You see a lot of Priests protecting or directly influencing the villain, the Christian who every one loves and respects turns into the mystery cereal killer to surprise audiences. Christians are portrayed in a very ignorant and derogatory light even in romantic comedies. They are among today's favorite choice of Arch Enemy. The old Lady who keeps a Bible on her night stand and prays for her neighbors salvation is now for some reason the PERFECT stereotype for an homicidal Dictator using fear of eternal damnation to manipulate her brain washed subjects. Silent Christ worshipers have the opportunity to starr in the next Summer of Sam, who did it, horror film.
You can't really escape it, it's a subtle brain washing orchestrated by the Antichrist forces of this world.
Its funny how lots of us can't really see how today's world would allow persecution and the complete outlawing of Christin practices when the truth is its already upon us. We are already living in a world who's fear dominates their ability to discerning right from wrong, truth from lie.
But for us who know Bible prophecy its really thrilling to see the Bible come to life. There is no denying that soon we will fulfill the final pages in the book of Revelation. For blessed is he that keepeth the sayings of the prophecy of this book, He which testifieth these things saith, Surely I come quickly. Amen. Even so, come, Lord Jesus.
The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen (Rev 22:7,20,21.


make him yours

Perfectly scientific ways to make him yours.
If he looks at you like he thinks you have a mental retardation, it's because he wants to know what makes you tick.
If he says, "what is your problem", Tell him your fine, only you'd be better off with more of him in your life. Men need to feel they are needed, be very, very needy! (good one to remember)
If he never asks you how your week went, tell him anyways.
When he is tired and trying to sleep, play him a song on a guitar that needs tuning. He'll be forced to spend some extra quality time with you teaching you how to tune.
When he is making jokes with his friends and they all start laughing, #1 Join them even if your not invited. #2 Laugh louder and harder then all the rest.
Try Poking him a lot, this can easily become a fun little game between just the two of you.
When it seems he wants to be left alone, make a point to ask him over and over what's wrong to let him know you care. It's important that you are very persistent with this one.
If you understand that your male of choice has preferences to say girls with bigger butts or breasts then yours, this can be very easily adjusted with toilet paper. Larger amounts can be applied according to the likes of your prince charming. Keep in mind that enlargements made to the rump can be tricky. You don't want it to look crumpled or "diaperish", but don' get discouraged, practice does make perfect.
And finally my favorite, once you have his full, undivided attention and he is eating from the palms of your hands, it's time to play hard to get. A guy needs to know your no "quick roll in the hay", so ignore him with everything you've got!!

There are so many wonderful ways you can make a guy love you. Notice I used the word make? It's because some times our beloveds need a little help making up their confused little minds.
But don't worry, show him all the Love and concern you can muster, and he'll soon come around.
These tricks can and will work if done in the right settings, I myself quite frequently have applied them over the last 22 years so I'll be sure to let you know when I've snagged one.
Happy fishing ladies.



He's such a Charmer Oh No!!!

I should be whipped 8 times, 8 because ur birthday is on the 8th ... whipped because it was last month. I'm sorry man, I've been so busy.
I love you Sam, ur the very best!
Brave, Savvy, and Honest.
Hope your getting the best out of life!


just cause

I would just like to state for the record, Jesus is all I got goin on.
Also I was voted 3rd home manager.... my thoughts on the mater are as follows. I should wear my glasses more for effect, my bathroom will never be dirty again, does this mean less or more work... more.

To celebrate, some of my favorit writings and poems... guess the composers.

U mean sooooooo much 2 me,,u are crazy as u can be, but thats goode u see, cause we r the people,,the goode people who shall rule & reign with our BEST Savior,,,lover of all Maries, & solver of all dilemmas,

Do you want a can opener man?

Be my salty wench


And ve are thinking that now is being good time to post new post.

If you see a food product in a grocery store that comes in a smaller package than usual, get it, because there's a very good chance it's cute

Chuck Norris CAN touch MC Hammer.

sorry, couldn't help myself




And there was great mourning and gnashing of teeth.
We lost to Argentina, might I comment it wouldn't hurt so bad only I'm living with an Argentine.

This would be sad if it wasn't so cute!!


Premi is leaving our happy home tonight. Bugger.


CTP with the kids

The kids had the opportunity to preform at an orphanage with us. It was a lot of fun to say the least.We all went dressed as clowns.
The little girls from the Orphanage had a blast trying to comunicate while playing with us girls and the kids.

we played games, sang songs, played dress up and just gave the kids a lot of love. Also we tried to make fools of our selves as a lot of the older girls were insecure and didn't want to participate.one thing I've found that really brakes the ice is taking pictures with them, that way you can pick them up and give them some good loving!

Anim from our home is really amazing with the kids. The whole operation would have been a shame without her haha.

Anyway, love you ALL, KGFG


a positive thing

a friend of mine was lecturing me on the need for me to cry more. Tears are kind of like our worries and fears leaving the body" he said. It's good for you.
He even sent me a song. "this should help excite some emotion", listen to it and let it rip.
My friend is a cancer and very in touch with his feelings. I like to brag about having a cancer rising but I'm afraid I'm just not as elegant or darling as most cancer chicks, and those tears don't come nearly as easy to me.
But, I've been working on finding an outlet for a problem I seem to have with suppressing my emotions. I used to believe my emotions were evil and that I should do everything it takes to suppress them.
My mother called me a wet blanket when I was a kid, so at an early age I began to suppress it. To my mom, wet blanket was a nick name for her much loved youngest daughter, to me it was a sign that I was the week link.
It's not that I've never cried, but I feel terrible when I do. I feel terrible when I feel in general.
can some one tell me the deference between being a bitter person and one who maybe has just learned from their mistakes and avoids making them.
Maybe I've swapped suppressing tears for simply avoiding situations that may cause them to begin with. Maybe bitter people hold everything inside where it festers and blackens the blood, cautious people just avoid the little black rain clouds.
So, I'm trying to allow myself the commodity of a tear here or there, it's not happened yet, but it really needs to. Being strong in myself is not allowing the Lord to be strong for me. It poisons the spirits and the physical body as well.
Ever since I've committed to being more humble in this aria, I hardly recognise myself. I actually hate it, I don't quite have it under control but it's going to take time, I think about a year and a half for the Lord to bring a better, meeker person out of me.
In the mean time, I hope you all see this as a positive thing and encourag and also pray for me.

I love you

I thot this was very appropriate



Desejo Meu

A taste of Brazlian Bossa Nova
I believe Rachelle Spring's brother "Mala" wrote this song.
Cheers Mala!
Why is it that romance sounds so good in Portuguese??
I miss you guys with all my heart.

I hope you enjoy this sandy ensemble done by Rachelle Spring and Pedro Gavin De La Vega.
If you don't mind, I would also like to add- Proof that long hair is very SEXY.

I'm dedicating this song, my melancholic fair well to beautiful Brazil!!
Cheers to the highly underrated, yet prevailing custom of Love!!

Desejo Meu (Life is Good)


Im not really sure why this clip reminds my brother of me, but I still think its post worthy....
its a pretty cool clip if you think about all it took to make it, and you have to see it all the way through too!



As you may know, the life after splat blog was designed to represent the many nose dives we must take before we find our way to "success" or, Victory! Also its my art form where I like to elaborate on all the best things in life.
Unfortunately the blog has wandered some from the original idea.
Some friends and people who are concerned about the purpose and direction of the blog have brought to my attention some of the posts that do not fall under a Godly, mature disciples beliefs and doctrines.
Most of the time my blog has been my personal play ground, but now as we are entering the offensive and more attention is being drawn to The Family, as well as its disciples, the blog should reflect more the professionalism that is being required of each of us.
I also heard from the Lord about it and together we have come to the conclusion that remodeling is needed. Or at least some adjustments need to be made. Basically this means better posts, and fewer as I will actually be taking the time to ask the Lord about my posts and...drum roll...edit them, hooray!
So Splat is just going through another coincidental "Splat", as is the way of soft moldable clay in the Potters hands.
So excuse me while I take some time to edit some of my old posts content. Call it, Spring cleaning.

Love your host Clay



Happy Freakin birthday Geminis!!

And what better way to celebrate then a new baby!

Happy birthday Mom, Ivan Da, Marry, Philo, Alex of Amber, Jaz of Clare, Ezmirelda Freedom, Rachelle Spring and any one else who I may have missed.
Oh Yes, My dear nephew Judah!! Happy Birthday Love?
sorry Steph, I tend to rush threw my posts.
Kathy, hey happy birthday!!

And now, for the biggest blinder of the mind, forgetting to add SAMSON, one of my oldest and beast friends, for some reason I forgot you bro, you can have a chunk of my heavenly reward. I love you!!

Another one I forgtot, Dr Dre... Love you Dre. Man, yet another cool Gemini! "Keep it comin"



The home took a very deserving trip to Vallarta.
Every one got a bungalows right in front of the beach and the Lord provided everything. I was able to provision a surf board for the entire duration of the trip.
We met too many wonderful people who showered us with blessings and welcomed us to the inviting, homey atmosphere of their home town. A lot of the spots we hung out in were ideal for meeting sheep and we ended up doing a lot of witnessing.
I spent a lot of time surfing with Tina as well, who totally creamed me. Tina was born in Hawaii so she's got the whole surfer chick thing down.
Being on the beach with my very own long board made me miss being with You da. Think we should hang out again some time soon.
while on the trip the Lord showed me something. Actually its something thats been pretty obvious to me.
being at the beach reminded me off all those hard times in my life, those scary moments when I had to get so close to the Lord in order to make it another day.

Well, after things settle down, so does that fire you have for Jesus, and I've been secretly asking him to do something to shake me up and bring me back to where I belong.
It's so obvious that this last month where every thing seems to be hanging in the balance has been his highest will for me, to help slow me down and make me focus on him. So now Im spending time doing the things I know he wants me to work more on, like Guitar and learning tricks for better follow up.

Anyway, love you da, and u too JD. thanks for your love and prayers.

Me Clay



So your a social misfit, I mean, we all have issues. we all claim to have been total losers at one point. We all have those old pictures of us when we were 15, and embarrassing stores of how our first crush found out we wanted to "spend the rest of our life making their babies". But then again, we all grow out of it. Some of my favorite people were the biggest nerds back in sixth grade. however there are notably two very distinct kinds of "unique" personalities. Some of them are just nerdy and awkward because of a character flaw or because of a physical feature that makes them unattractive; these features often grow on them and become there "personal charm" in adulthood, so to speak. My big brother is a classic example with his split teeth and big ears. These kinds of "nerds" grow out of the insecurity and on to better things, like marrying that hottest chick in Jersey. Then there are the other kinds of nerds. These guys tend to be shy but incredibly intelligent. They spend their youth fighting the norm and refusing to be like the "in crowed" which they secretly envy, yet at the same time they'll try to create their own "Cool" which they hope will become more widely accepted. These are the types of nerds I would like to expound upon.
While some nerds are like apples that have simply fallen farther away from the mother tree, these sort of nerds are better related to limes growing on a berry bush. They don't want to be a stereo-type and because of their constant push in the opposite direction, they can earn an ugly reputation at a young age. They become "the nerd who thinks he's cool". but worse then annoying Their peers, they soon catch the eye of their superiors, who happen to have a say in whether or not their presence is a con or a pro.
Chances are, because they are so controversial to the written way, they will be labeled a con. That's when they'll have to make a decision. If the only way to earn respect is to shape up, then they'll give it their best shot, and their best shot is probably better then average. Besides, they figure they can make more significant changes in their environment once they're in a position that is acknowledged by all. So they put their plans on the back burner for a while and begin to fit in. NOT, They still think it's way cooler to greet their friends by dumping a cup of water on them, after all, friends get their humor and should understand. They still do things like, throw the couch pillows across the room after being asked a few times not to by the host who already has it in for them. To them, it's not a big deal, but they just unknowingly added another spot on their already muddied reputation. They probably didn't even notice their host picking up pillow after pillow while trying to figure out if this person really didn't hear them, or if their actually doing their very best to make people dislike them all the more. There are plenty of people in their favor and dismiss these sorts of things as just the genius's natural tendency. It comes with the label. And along with the typical genius comes what I believe is just plain and simple indifference. Family, friends and lovers all fall prey to the genius's typical "you don't understand" take on everything. And after enough misunderstandings, friends can be labeled as "just like all the others". Sadly, they'll find themselves with about as few friends, and about the same popularity vote as before. It seems to them that no one cares about how hard they try. They look at their clothes, their hair, It's all been adjusted to help them fit in, they become mad at them self and every one else who made them put their original quest on the back burner. They even started being more social when they'd prefer to sit in their room brainstorming something original yet so totally obvious that they'll wonder why no one else thought of it. So, sooner or later, they shut off. they need some time to rethink things. They go back to the drawling board and while away, you can bet things here and there will start to unravel. People start to wonder where the heck they are. They probably don't realize them self, but they play a major part in the way things are run. Even once they take off all those pretenses, there is still that solid core which makes them positively necessary to the work. A childish monkey with really lame humor, but still totally brilliant and essential. The only danger is burning out, giving more then they can. Any one who attempts to please every one will soon bring them self to a point where it's just too much and they'll sooner or later shut off leaving every one wondering why they went cold fish.The major guid line a guineas should abide by is pacing ones self, and if you think your giving more then you feel you can, it's cause your working in the flesh. Let the Lord have his way, He'll make sure to balance you out and set you on coarse again. If your giving more then you can your apt to collapse and not only hurt yourself but those you admirer. But you don't need to tell a brilliant mind that, they probably already know.



Anonymous Haters

So ya, don't make me angry
I get really lame when Im angry
You wouldn't like me when Im angray

all lame and angry


The Offensive and YOU!

The best part about the offensive is doing away with our former approach to discipleship.
Now, being a disciple means being professional. Thats right! more Action less Reaction!
Meeting people and making every person count, every person who donates of their time and money to support our work. And now it's not about what they can give, its about what we can offer them which is very exciting and something I've been wanting to pursue for a long time.
And what does it mean to be professional? A professional doesn't have a job they clock in and out of, a professional wakes up in the morning, their head bursting with ideas of how to make that day more profitable then before.
A professional doesn't ask, "can we do this"? A professional gets up, walks over and answers the question.
welcome to the new face of The Family and it's International Group of Professionals. Get busy


Pray for Jojo

Dear Ones ,Please help me with your prayers and Extreme praises on this big trial and serious situation. When I got the news ,The Holly spirit gave me the verses: "And we know that all things work together for good,,," and "The what the enemy meant for evil,The Lord shall use to bring about a great victory.Joseph is now clay on the potter's hands..."PTL. Yesterday,as Victor and I came home from our Bible study with Luis and Kristy's family we got some bad news: My son Joey (21) ,was staying with Sam and Angel in Columbus Ohio.At about 3pm.He was walking to the mall to meet with them.but he never made it! eventually some one saw him on the side of the road and called 911.He was admitted some time in the late afternoon at Memorial Hospital,in Columbus OH. with several fractures on his skull ,a fractured collar bone ,a broken jaw ,broken nose.He also had air pockets on the brain and the doctors say that can cause him sleep into a coma! Joey didn't remember what happened to him. I was finally able to talk to him but the nurse told me it wasn't of much use as he might not remember much.I just asked her to put the phone in his year...I didn't told him who I was ,I just read from Psalms.I called several times at night and At the last time i called I told him :"Joey I want to pray for the night....I told him good night and with much difficulty he replied "I love you mom." This morning I called the hospital several times but could not talk to him. He is heavily sedated with morphine! I talked to the nurse for a update.and there are good news.The air pokets on his brain are almost gone.(They went to his face !!!!) ,also they can't find the fracture on the collar bone....Joseph is now clay on the Potter's hands! The Lord is remaking him and I am so thankful! I'll write more about him later...there are lots of lessons here. Please pray for a miracle recovery,for him to be able to hear the Word .For wisdom for the people caring for him.And last but not least,pray for me. I am in the victory about it,most of the time but sometimes I get tested and fail ! Pray for Victor as well.for encouragement and strength. Love you lots.Pandita.

Joey Just turned 21..
Love you Babe, my heart and prayers are with you, In Jesus name you'll be ok!!

Ur Ree ree


Please pray for Jojo

He's in the hospital with a broken collar bone, Jaw bone, nose and smashed skull. and he has air in his brain. His memory is slowly coming back to him after a lot of prayer and he was able to talk to mom over the phone. He doesn't remember what happened to him.
Please pray for my brother's complete healing, not only physically but spiritually.


"what the heck"!!

I really have no idea whats going on... I mean.. what the heck.
I do know this, my mind is made... because Jesus "insinuated" that I should go ahead and continue to Guadalajara, I am flying out at 8 am.
I'll miss Pomona. This photo in loving memory

I loved all who were positive, in the event of my demise. 2pac

Kevin! There are NO dancing girls...this IS the Going away PARTY, DEAL with it!

Dr Dre Tribute

I’ve drunk bile in my bones
At the grandest of delusions,
And reached alto in the Thrones (or "phones"??)
To clamber up confusions.

And so I soared from seas of night
And floated on the moon,
I met a girl of grand delight
And made her swan to swoon.

To douse my head, and wipe my pen;
To write—to think!—of better men.

In Honor of one of my favorite writers, Dre
Excerpts from "Epiphany of the Creative" & "The Writers Bewilderment".

I love you Dre, and I pray for you.
Cheers to the goode times


men are insightful

Men are so insightful.
Sam and Marty have been trying to convince me to buy things from them as they are starting an new business. While Sam is explaining the infinite possibilities of the "i touch", Marty is trying hard to say the same thing, only Sam is more animated, so he wins...this time.
But that didn't stop Marty form trying..."Marie, marie, marie, marie, marie..."What is it Marty!! I demand. "Sorry. He says, my ram wasn't fast enough". Oh, that explains the monotone repetition.

Pop corn is all I've eaten for two days. Why? because there is no more bread for peanut butter and molasses sandwiches. The situation looks pretty bleak. I just stopped myself from pouring pop corn into my coffee cup, the coffee machine was right by the pop corn pot, and I'm clearly not in my right mind without peanut butter.
So Sam's been mad at me all morning. You can always tell Sam is mad when he answers you with rhetorical questions. Right now his belly is the only thing keeping him from being sucked into the computer.
Sam's insight..."some times your a real pain". I wasn't doing anything, just sitting here eating pop corn with a cup of joe. But knowing Sam there is a reason for this sudden open heart.
What makes you say that? I ask sweetly. "Cause, some times you'll be all fun and laughing, then you'll be all serious, sitting there with those eyes.
I look to my beloved brother trying to see if maybe he can make sense of Sams "insight".
Martin agrees... yeah, some times you'll be all "Sam, where is the formula??
I jog my memory, maybe they both have gone insane and are confusing me for my sister, then I realized it was me after all. I did ask for the baby formula... it was me...how could I have been so cruel as to ask Sam for the baby formula. "I'm sorry Sam, the baby was screaming and hungry and, and... there's no point. I am ashamed. But at least Sam got that off his chest. We can go on being friends now.

Obscure... why do they catch me asking for formula but don't even flinch when Steph says aloud. "I'm going to the car to get the strap on!
Just so you all know, steph uses a "Strap on" baby carrier for little Aidan. I guess well all just accept that in good faith.

"if thats what your into"

New Zealand guys are sexy...


stud shopping...simply no good deals

Angie, thanks for the most chaotic night I've had in years.
Just between us two, Clubs are not the right places to "fellowship".
Where the heck is the luck of the Irish?? Seems to me you may have lost your lucky charm... never mind, who needs charm when your from Switzerland... Thank God you brought your birth certificate or no one would have believed us.

and these little piggies cried RAAHHHH" WOOORRRRR" RAAAAAA" all the way home


if I may

I'm here with my brother Marty, well actually, next to me is a 4 month old child trying his hardest to make what sounds like a colossal poop. I fear for the mother.
So yes, I missed my flight but I think the Lord has a secret reason for allowing it.
Martin Goode just popped in from NYC, hes been traveling and doing gigs with a Jaz and Blues cover band. Other then losing his 500$ tux, it's SoOO nice to see my brother in good mental and physical health. Must take full advantage of every awkward moment spent trying to understand his humor. And yes Martin, that was a joke. HA HA. try and laugh along.

Steph is working out, Sam is sleeping like a big fat cat, and Ambie is no doubt editing photos while trying to keep up with her two sons, one of which just finished relieving himself and I'm sure is in need of assistance.

So I'm steeling photos from off Marty's computer, never seen before as Marty has a bad habit of neglecting the family tradition of sharing the "scoop". I never hear from my brother and when I finally do, he is his own man with a job, a career, and what seems to be... Street Smarts! Lovely
Now these great photos will be posted on my blog where I can enjoy time and time again in the company of...myself as usually no one else gives a rats furry little butt about your little brother's artsy way of accentuating human body parts, like... say feet.


the dark cloud

I knew it would happen one day, with all the flying I do, I mean, why would every one always be so freaked about about it if it never happened? "you have to be there two hours in advance".. why does every one always say that! Because precious, some times traffic is so thick you can't see the road in front of you, some times there will be a road hog who will absolutely refuse to let you cross to get to your exit. Some times, it just happens.
at least now I can use the greatest excuse in the world for not being where your supposed to be, " I missed my flight"... say it slowly... "you missed your flight". Now let it sink in. There are worse things. Like being kicked out of your home, or your country, or having your kids taken away from you. None of the above do I have to worry about, so I'm totally at peace. maybe the Lord wants me to spend more time with marty, call all the people I haven't got to see while in the US. Maybe he knew I needed more time to make cash. maybe Sam isn't ready to let go just yet.. maybe my shuttle to Guadalajara is going to crash some where miles away from civilization where i'll only have naked Indians to keep me company.
Love you
See you when I see you.



I'm learning about love lately. The genius of something so affective that even stubborn hearts and minds can still be changed threw its power. Love isn't just holding on threw a storm of adversities, but its also letting go, letting the one you want to rescue go knowing you've done everything you can; leaving them to face their maker on their own. Love is trusting the Lord for the out come knowing that he loved us first.
Love is that peace on a mother's face when all of her kids are screaming and crying in the back seat.
Love is building your life on the foundation of some one else's dreams, love is strong enough to hold some one close when they are pushing themselves over the edge. Love kisses, caresses and only sees beauty in a face that's been worn beyond repair.
I'm not an expert on love, please forgive me for being a guru. Truthfully I think I've made mistakes regarding profound love. Still it moves me deeply to see selflessness, people who smile threw adversity for the sake of their children, people who cope with emotional torture for the sake of a greater cause.
This last month I've seen and felt more love then I believe I could ever muster up myself. I fear being a good mother, a good lover, even a good friend. Still, every time I look at my own mother, my sister and my very close friends, I realize in truth they are all very much like me, and the kind of love this life demands of us is so much deeper then we ourselves could ever take credit for to begin with. Only God's love could possibly fill the void. I believe that when my family and friends have reached the end of their rope, when they look up they'll always see Jesus at the other end ready to give more slack, cause he never runs out.
I know he can do the same for me, This year I asked him for the kind of love that gives and gives. I really don't think I feel it, but I know there is more slack just waiting for me when I need it.

This year I want to love you, I want to encourage you to wait for your turn. I want to hold you when you need the comfort and let you go when you need the air. I want to trust you while I build your faith in me.
I want to admire your strength, be amazed by your beauty and thrilled for your success.
I want to do all this without sarcasm or secret contempt. I want to make you believe I admire you enough to point and laugh at you without making you feel insecure. I want to only pay you genuine complements so you wont think I'm superficial. I wont only write you, call you and satisfy you when I want something in return, you wont hear from me once a year when I need a favor.
I'll pray for you when you need prayer. I'll pay for the meal. Friends like you are a quality investment
I want to offer you all the love thats been available to me.



I just love Stephanie to pieces! She is....something special!



This has been my month of catching up, my time away from the thing I hate being away from. My affair; my mutual romance with life outside the box, my adventure, which is at the moment "to be continued".
I am making goode use of my time away from the field. Is it ok that I spell good with a silent e??

I think you should know, right now I'm having a moment, although its hard to say what kind. I'm at peace but afraid. There are butterflies in my stomach yet I feel empty. I'm happy, but also there is a sneaky sort of sadness, kind of like a grey cloud swelling with rain just above the prancing little butterflies, a cold under current in tropical water. It's like... depression.
I think the sadness I feel isn't mine, thats why I don't really feel it.
I have way too much to be thankful for to be sad anyway. This month I was given a bundle of memories, memories of you smiling, some of you crying and others were a mix of the two. These memories will last me long after your gone.
So here's what I'm willing to do, I'm going to take this rainbow of emotion and savor it, every shade of brilliant yellow, orange and red, along side the blues. What are rainbows without the blues anyway?
No use being sad when your supposed to be happy, God wants us to enjoy the happy days, without them life is one big shade of blue. So if you don't mind, I'm going to enjoy my shades of yellow and I wont deny you the right to the blues although I'm sorry, I can't join you singing them. It's my turn to be Jazzed.
But I'll never forget your smile and I'll pray always for it to return. You deserve to smile again... but please don't rub off on me. I want to be happy, and if you let me...maybe even happy enough for the two of us.
oh no, this is a rant.. wana see some fun pics??

As soon as I arrived in California I was starving, so the guys toook me for lunch on the beach!

But then Jesse had to take off to Puerto Rico

So the next day Steph got me up at 6 to go on a six mile hike...Up!

umm.. the end.. 4 now