Well, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed these past few weeks. Lord knows when I don’t get my exercise in I tend to get wound up pretty tight.
I keep getting sick and the weather has been cold and rainy. On top of that my good running shoes have not yet arrived from the states. When I don’t get exercise I have to diet, and that just seems to make my body weaker as I’m not getting my natural vitamins. Not to mention I’m always fighting back the twinge of hunger. Things admittedly have been pretty gloomy here. A good chunk of our teem officially left this morning. Also dear Phil went to the FDTP, Jess is away at a friends house…my Jess. I’m alone and the house is grumpy. I can tell because every where I go I feel extremely uninvited. Every room is empty and there are few people home to frolic with on this, my free day.
I will make good use of my freedom yet!
You will taste the fruits of this WR soon enough, I’m posting Anita’s song on Splat! So other then impersonating a music producer, I took some prophecy time to ask the Lord about what to do about all the issues at hand and some how my prophecy time turned into intercessor prayer.
I often don’t realize it but half of my body’s tension is due to my worrying about friends and family. I only realized how affected by it I am once I felt the amazing release that putting them all in the Lord’s hands brought. “What’s going on that’s stressing you out”? Besides the LOOMING UNSERTANTY THAT GRIPS ME EVERY MORNING and Evening, DEMANDING MY CONSTANT ATTENTION…deep breaths… it’s the babies…yes…mostly the babies that are popping up every where? I’ve scarcely lavished my love abundantly enough on the nephew and nieces at hand, and now every one is on round two and even three. Yes, my best friend (Jessica Jackson) is on her THERD child! She is only a year older then me. (Happy birthday by the way love). JD and Terry are on their first. Jo, Steph, Angel, and God knows who else are on round two.
Man, I don’t even know if all these children will ever know the joy of having an aunty Clay! That’s the reality of it folks, if you want your children to establish a strong relationship with me your going to have to slow down! I had a dream the other night; I was at a family reunion and all around me were children. Not one of which were mine.
Anyway I made an attempt to pray for you all and once I got really into my PV I almost couldn’t stop. So many people I love. Then there were the actual prayer requests. You know when people send you these little off lines asking for prayer for this and that? Well all at once they came to me and I prayed for each and every one.
I would like to take a moment to commend my room mate for her initiative to wake up early for these things so she has the rest of her day to focus on home basics. She is also doing the XD course; that takes up about 1/6 of her day no joke. Plus she attends ballet classes and gives them as well.
With me P&P time all comes with the right setting, I have to feel at peace and I tend to meditate a lot. (meditate is code for space out) Lately I’ve been realizing that when I don’t feel able is when its most important to work for my time with the Lord, otherwise I get stressed.
Its not good to let yourself get wound up too tight, although not many people seem to notice when I’m under pressure. In fact, people seem to think I’m “always so smiley”. It’s a good thing, the Lord’s grace is sufficient for us no? I find though, that trying too hard to appear pleasant when your worried about babies n such, can be a little self destructive. I mean, if you are really resting in the Lord then you’ll naturally have that calm childlike faith, but I think what’s been going on is that I am carrying too much of the load and not giving the Lord the bulk of the wait.
I think I’ve taught myself to take large amounts of pressure over the years. Not too much tends to surprise me yet at the end of the day I lose sleep scrutinizing each and every malfunction that’s occurred.
I once read about Scorpios being very connected to their bodies. “that’s stupid, every one is connected to their body”. Yes well we are very in touch with our physical and spiritual body. This means when my spirit isn’t getting its needs met my physical body will respond and be weekend.
I remember being so out of shape when I was younger, my spirit was also very out of shape. The two always seem to come hand in hand. I can’t believe people who know me now label me as a cheery person. If they’d met be back in the day they might have tried to perform an exorcism. I was intense then; and I didn’t even go through half the stuff I go through now. Now days I am much more in touch with my physical health and it seems that I have closed up a little to the spirit world except when the Lord is really trying to show me something. One must learn the perfect balance. I’ve been unfaithful with both this last month. After about three weeks of odd head aches, light fever and all that implies, my room mate got on her prayer bones and beseeched the Lord while I was yet reaching for the beautiful beyond. “ I know your going to heal her Lord because you love me and want me to be happy”. Its true, Jess’s virtue has got to count for something even if the Lord is displeased with me. After that I was determined to be healed. I went for a jog the very next day. Surprisingly, other then my phony jogging shoe replacements everything seemed intact, my muscles were just aching for me to use them.
I’ve also picked yoga back up to help my “cadaver” feel refreshed and in turn so does my spirit. There’s actually a whole GN about how stress and many forms of depression can release poisons into your body. Keeping mental and physical stress in check is the key to a healthy lifestyle.
Some of you may notice that I am not exactly Miss Universe physically. My wait is a constant bother to me but it helps me stay on my toes. Most people wouldn’t know that I tend to be somewhat of a fitness nerd but its true. I’m a ginger tea drinking, yoga-esc kind of gal. although Brazilian coffee has increasingly grown into an addiction. Our daily coffee is like thick, black cups of desire. Ahhhh”!
So my self restraint is not too stringent, I try and keep a healthy balance though Im not physically where I want to be and still tend to be a little insecure. All the girls in my home have typical tight little Brazilian bodies. I have Ivan’s bone structure.
But I’ve learned its not worth harping on things you can’t change, wait is always something I can work on, I like to keep pretty flexible too. Flexibility (other then being just plain fun) plays a vital roll in the aging process. You can avoid all kinds of medication and operations by working on your elasticity and stretching your muscles and tendons frequently.
All this to say I really need to get to work. I can only imagine how much ground I have to cover to make up for a whole month of vegetating.
The Never Ending Sarcasm of an FGA Mind
Most FGAs are loaded with wisdom. Sunny is a well of knowledge and good judgment. There are few soild reasons I can think of for her union with EZ other then his charm, cooking knack and ostentatious whit. I did however discover she was once “Miss age of Aquarius” herself. She still loses control when we bust out into 70s rock music. Under that apprehensive stair hidden behind thick retro glasses, there is a total hippy, rock star, diva chick lurching.
However somewhere between writing ancient Family classics to weaving flowers in her hair she managed to run into her greatest challenge. A scorching hot little guy named uncle EZ. Well, it wasn’t EZ yet, or uncle for that matter. Ezekiel was given his alias “EZ” for obvious reasons. He is extremely laid back and lovable, that I get.
What I can’t figure out is when he is being serious. He sings, sleeps, cooks, dances, and some times holds whole activated meeting in the uninhibited language of sarcasm.
I haven’t yet run into any trouble communicating with him, if anything his sarcasm is charming. The best way to get past it is to simply grin (sarcastically) grab hold of his two cheekand give them a good shaking. After a moment or so of his very intimidating, bearded smile, you’ll know its time to let go.
When I fist arrived his daughter was constantly reassuring me that he was only kidding. Some how I manage to be one of those who find him insatiably charismatic, he actually is much like my god father. They are both Sagittarius, both are well learned in culinary arts, and both are charming beyond reason…if you can get past the sarcasm.
Most people that try and be funny with him are met with, “yeah….chuckle….that was funny….chuckle….heh…(deep breath followed by a long pause)…Ohhhh…weeewph….your a riot…wasn’t that funny?
That will go on for about three minuets or so, then, once he catches the second parties eye he’ll look sternly at them until they are forced to look away. Sag men usual have a hard core stare.
This sarcasm has also rubbed off on other people in the home.
The other day uncle Chris was doing dishes next to me. “Well”! He exclaimed while I waited for more FGA enlightenment…”is a deep subject. I only caught on after turning to leave the kitchen. Took me long enough but I’ll blame that on his accent.
It was damn funny and righteously corny.
The three brothers in the home have also learned much from their father’s sarcasm. I believe it holds a curtain amount of leverage in getting them dates.
“picture a cute little Vega male, long black hair and thick glasses. You engage in a very natural conversation and while he seem to be there with you, the moment you say “ it was huge” he replies with “you haven’t seen nothing yet” never mind the fact you were talking about a mosquito bite from the night before. And if you are by any chance clever like me, and you try your best to avoid sexual connotations, chances are while your baring your soul to them over a glass of wine they’ll be fidgeting with the corkscrew. The result will be a fabulous way to say “screw you”!